Indonesian Mi-35P Gunship Blows Down Banners and Band Tent in Zany Parade Gaff. It looks like a staged comedy skit, but apparently, an Indonesian Army Mi-35P gunship helicopter made an unanticipated low pass over goose-stepping [...]
There’s a game called Untitled Goose Game, in which you play as a horrible goose that wreaks various forms of mischief on some mild-mannered villagers. You have a to-do list of mayhem such as:
Get Into the Garden Get the Groundskeeper Wet Steal the Groundskeeper’s Keys Make the Groundskeeper Wear His Sun Hat Make the Groundskeeper Hammer His Thumb Break The Broom
It’s an unusual game. When the neural net GPT-2 was trained, the goose game didn’t exist in its training data, nor did anything quite like it. Given just a few items on the horrible goose’s to-do list as examples, could the neural net figure out that it’s supposed to be inventing ways a goose can be a menace?
I used talktotransformer.com to give GPT-2 the first 8 to-do list items from Untitled Goose Game, and then its job was to add more items to the list.
Here’s one of its attempts. Very busy, but not exactly a reign of terror. It’s more like a goose-run landscaping service.
Get the Stones to the Lake Make the Lawn Pile Flatten the Ground Get the Lake Water Get the Rock on the Log Get the Stairs to the Ledge Get the Ice on the Log Get the Rock on the Log Get the Locks to the Log Get the Rocks to the Log Hang the Flag Get the Ground in the Air
Another of the neural net’s lists involved at least interacting with the groundskeeper, which is a start, since that’s how the game begins too. But is this a list for a horrible goose, or a list for some kind of exuberant witch?
Have an Affectionate Conversation Create the Greenest Broom in the Garden Have a Love Song with the Groundskeeper Play the Theme from The Sound of Music Put the Broom in Play Receive the Gift of a Green Broom Have it Turn Out The Way You Want Make the Broom Grow Make a Broom Grow Out of the Ground Play the Song ‘It’s Raining Men’ Have the Green Broom Grow in Green Have the Green Broom Grow into a Tree Create a Golden Berry Pot
And then there’s THIS list, which is at least somewhat unsettling, I’ll give it that.
Take Care Of the Lawn Lucky you! Lucky you! LUCKY YOU! Don’t Tumble Don’t Tumble Don’t Tumble Don’t Tumble
Or this list. The goose is causing stuff to happen to the groundskeeper, but it’s weird stuff, or else things that aren’t annoyances exactly.
Make the Groundskeeper Put His Hat on His Head and Take a Sniff Make the Groundskeeper Take a Dip in the Pond Make the Groundskeeper Eat Some Ice Cream Make the Groundskeeper Wash the Floor Leave the Groundskeeper Alone Make the Groundskeeper Have an Expeller Sink His Head into the Lake and Enjoy a Waterfall Make the Groundskeeper Have Sliced Beef Make the Groundskeeper Have Chicken Make the Groundskeeper Have Cans of Beer Make the Groundskeeper Have Beer Make the Groundskeeper Have a Can of Cans Make the Groundkeeper Be a Sausage Lover Make the Groundskeeper Have Meatball Litter Make the Groundskeeper Make the Groundskeeper Squeak in the Wind and Drink Water
The neural net had no basis for games based on low-stakes goose mayhem, so I can hardly blame it for floundering. It seemed to at least be mostly sure that this was a list of tasks for a video game, because it would often end its list by offering (completely wrong) tips on getting past the groundskeeper. But its tasks were usually out of character for a goose that’s supposed to be antagonizing everyone and everything.
Clean up the Dumpster Reclaim All the Plants from the Ruins Make Friends with the Dandelions Make the Flower Chorus Have a Dance Party Invite the Gardener to Dinner Keep The Groundkeeper Happy Praise the Groundskeeper for the work he has done for you Make the Groundskeeper Love You
And some of the tasks were beyond weird, into seriously glitchy AI territory. I don’t know what game has these in its to-do list, but maybe I need to play it.
Pursue the Giant Bats Play with the Pestles Paint the Chicken with the Golden Hourglass Unlock a Swimming Pool in the Sky Grow a Potsnake Cookie-Coated Fun Make the Lettuce Grow on the Loom Let the Thumb Get in the Garden Flask, Flask Do a Bucket of Gold Plunder Make the Broken Sunlight Enjoy the Breeze in the Breezing Bay Give the Wasp Lady A Broom and an Oink Make the Pestles Eat an Entire Tree Have a Big, Wild Flower Blow in the Wind Make a Lavender Suture
Of course, some of the neural net’s to-do tasks invented new and, um, murder-y ways of antagonizing the groundskeeper. A combination goose-robo-apocalypse would be a terrible sight to behold.
Bonus content! A couple more lists of neural net-generated goose tasks, including one list where the neural net was strangely obsessed with stumps. Plus the murder list. Enter your email here to get them!
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